Tuesday, October 12, 2004

hee..i'm super full now. at last..pizza for dinner!! yay!! gotta thked joel cos he was the one hu wanted to give the family a treat. hee..thx manz.. for those of u hu got no idea hu joel is, he is my youngest bro. yeah..nice boi rite? ;)


ok..looking back on the past few days, i'm not being myself already. i'm starting to turn to the person of the other side of me. won't tell u wat's my other side like but definitely, not the gal hu u see in church. but somehow, it is beginning to reveal bit by bit of it. hmm..not gd..really not gd.. gonna haf to control myself again. i dun wanna be the person i once used to be. speaking of tis, some things in tis yr n the past 3 yrs in ym are starting to come back again. the feelings..the troubles..the tots..all at one shot. why can't dey all juz disappear n not come back into my mind? why muz dey come back to trouble n hurt me again? ahh.. maybe being back to my old self will make tings easier for me. at least, i will juz hit back n dun care wat others tink. hu cares anyway? God? my family? friends? yeah rite..like i care..


yikes..why did i write these all down in here??? erm..nvm..let u all haf an idea of wat my other side is like. at the moment, dun pissed me off or get me angry at u. or else... i need time to retake control. i wanna be moulded into God's likeness. but..is it possible? o well..gonna see how.. all these will aso affect my decision for baptism nxt yr. i want to declare to God, satan and the ppl wif a clear n ready heart n mind to make tat stand.


k..gg to study or..shld i slp? dunno.. cya..

Dre@my JeSs Life Written @ 3:04 PM